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| Funny how lyrics are sometimes so right on...WHOA, it's been almost a year since a posted. Well, am working at a coffeeshop on campus and was listening to Pandora when Next To Me came up. (Don't worry, this is not how I am feeling right now...but when I finally paid attention to Jordin Spark's Next To Me lyrics, i realized how they are pretty true to feelings that we have at one time or another.) Don't u sometimes wonder why things have to be so complicated? I do. Two o' clock and I wish that I was sleeping
You're in my head like a song on the radio
All I know is I got to get next to you
Yeah I got to get next to you
Sitting here turning minutes into hours
To find the nerve just to call you on the telephone
'Cause You don't know that I got to get next to you
[Chorus]
Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it's just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you (I got to get next to you)
I asked around and I heard that you were talking
Told my girl that you thought I was out of your league
What a fool, I got to get next to you, whoa
Yeah it's five in the morning and I can't go to sleep
'Cause I wish, yeah I wish that you knew what you mean to me
Baby let's get together and end this mystery, oh
[Chorus]
Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?
[Chorus]
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| It takes near-death experiences to remind me of God's blessings....These past week, I'm once again reminded how little control I have over my life. It can be wisked away any moment.... what am I doing to live it well?
Everything escalated to this morning (*if you want to skip, it's blessing #3)(skip to the bottom for why I know it was God who kept me alive this week) ...
Blessing # 1...
Last Friday, I picked Pat up from Hyde Park and was on our way back up Lake Shore Drive when we almost got into a car accident. I was on the outermost lane (4 lanes total) going approx. 55+ and when I rounded the corner, I saw that the 2nd outermost lane had a backup. I already knew that someone was going to pull out so I began to decelerate, but not fast enough.... i could see the front wheel of the 2nd to last car begin turning and ready to come out into my lane with less than 4 car spaces away. Knowing that I couldn't possibly decelerate in time without hitting him, I began to honk, hoping he won't pullout. But of course, he pauses, then STILL decides to pull out in front of me. By then, I was already down to less than 2 car spaces away from his side....I continue to honk and slam on my brakes. My anti-lock brakes had already gone off as I feel my car come to an abrupt halt, but since it was soo little time (less than 20 seconds) for deceleration from 55mph, my car just couldn't stop. The funny thing was, AFTER he comes out... he slowly accelerates and there was a moment in time when my front was literally 1 inch away from his side rear. My heart must've skipped a beat... i felt like i couldn't breath. Luckily, noone was following me - 'cuz that would have meant that Pat and I would've been sqooshed in the middle between the slow car in front of me and one who can't possibly stop in time as well.
Blessing #2...
On my way to work every morning, on Lincoln Ave, I have to turn from a 3 lane road into a 2 lane. The left-most lane only turns left, the middle lane can go straight or turn left, and the right lane can go straight. On Monday, I was in the left-most lane turning left. A truck was to my right (in the middle lane) ALSO turning left. Green light turns, both truck and I begin accelerating. In the middle of my turn, I noticed out of the corner of my eyes that the truck's part was awfully close to me. I turned my head and realized that he was almost on top of me! I pulled more left, but it hit me that I was going into on-coming traffic if I turn even more left. I looked at my rearview mirror and everyone was driving so closely behind me... if I slammed on my brakes to avoid being sucked under the truck, surely someone will rear-end me instead. I began to pray and honk like crazy. Luckily, the truck driver finally realized that he was in my lane and quickly pulled over to his right, giving me enough room to drive by.
Blessing #3...
This morning, right outside my office, I stopped at a red light after turning off the I94. I've always developed a habit to look in my rearview mirror before stopping and to stop at least 1/2 a car's space away from the car in front of me to make sure that in case the person in the back tailgates and can't stop in time, I won't be sandwiched and pushed fwd to hit the car in front of me. I was going about my routine and I saw the woman in the Toyota Rav4 behind me stop... i turned my attention back to the front of my car. About 2 seconds later, I get rammed in the back... i was so surprised, i totally sprung around in my seat and dropped my jaw towards the Toyota behind me. In that split second, I see her blinking her eyes as if she just woke up. I have to admit, I was stunted for a couple of seconds... all that was going through my mind was... o my god, i'm going to be late for work.... i don't want to know what damage this is.... I got out of the car and she immediate asked, are you okay? I'm a nurse, does your neck hurt? Did I hit you hard? All I was thinking was...are you kidding me? I saw you stop! And THEN you hit me???? She proceeds to explain that she was a RN from Northwestern Memorial and had just gotten off the night shift. She admitted to falling asleep at the wheel and since we were on a decline, she let go of her brakes and her car rammed into mine. Praise God... but so far, I don't think I'm hurt. I still won't know if I had any injuries from the little jerk yet, but we'll know tomorrow or the day after.
I've had two close encounters with some serious injuries and even death this week. I began to see how God's hands have been working to protect me from these situations ever since the summer.
When I was deciding what car to buy in the summer, I went through a couple of models and even thought I could just take the older family car. However, the anti-lock brake system has already been shot by then and if you know my parents, you know that they would have never agreed to give me the old car. So, my parents went out and bought a brand new one for me. Then comes time to decide on the lower vs. higher series and what model.... I rather them spend less, and the lower series just came out with a new designs...so obviously, i wanted the lower series one. But God led my parents to decide on the higher model, bigger body, and the special edition model. I couldn't see it then, but I know now that it was planned.
If I had just taken the older car, I wouldn't have even remotely stopped last Friday decelerating 55mph in less than 2 seconds. If my parents had bought the lower series with the smaller body, I would have been crushed or flew off the turn on Monday. If my mom hadn't called me last night and began to list all these things she wants me to change about my driving, it wouldn't have been on my mind this morning to leave room in front of me and to check if anyone's tailgating me. It wasn't because I was smart or made any right decisions... but it was because it wasn't my time to go. I'm turning 23 tomorrow. God knew that I wasn't to leave here at any of those moments.
I actually kind of feel bad about the way I treated her. I had worked for 13 hours straight (8am-9pm) and I wasn't in the mood for nagging/lecturing. I screamed into the phone for her to leave me a lone and let me sleep...but she pressed on. she wouldn't let me off the phone until she has reminded me again and again to be careful on the road, especially when the weather is cold and roads are slippery.
When I called her this morning on my way to work, she said again: 'be careful'. I replied, "i'm old enough to take care of myself, I'll be careful". She added, " i have a bad feeling about you driving today." I didn't know what she was talking about and frankly, thought she was a little paranoid. But lo and behold, my rear-end incident happened today. Looking back, God put the idea in her head and told her to tell me about it. God is really amazing and I'm reminded once again that my life is not for granted. I can die any day, any time, any where, and any way. No one can predict their life, and I'm no exception... but I rest assured that God knows every hair on my head and he certainly knows the days of my life.
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| Remember the days when snow days meant no school?Well, that's not the case anymore. Today was the first day that it hit me - there's no more snow days for the next x amount of years in my life!
Today, I woke up to blizzarding snowfall and gusting winds. The price I pay for living next to the lake is the absolutely frightening thought of one of these days, my windows might just bust at an altitude of 20 stories due to the Chicago wind. I was already prepared to stay home and work today as the weather channels have been bustling with wintry news. So, it didn't come as such a surprise. I guess the more surprising thing is - what a mess the roads were! The reason it was surprising was because when I was in school, i didn't need to care whether the roads/highways were bad or not. I merely walked everywhere or take the CTA... but today, I needed to drive to work and...well, it didn't happen.
So, i spent my day at home, watchign the snow fall, and reading my articles for my top technology report. I have to admit, I kinda liek this work fro home thing. It's so much more relaxing and I'm more productive, as noone walks by my desk and chats. And oh, david pi can't walk by and sneak up behind me and scare the crap out of me either. ha.
well... i guess i have to eventually say goodbye to snow days that consist of playing outside in the snow and not caring about work. Good bye.
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| Have you ever been THIS tired?wow...i haven't been on this thing for 2 months!
below is the reason why.....
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| the reality of workingToday was my first day at work. I loved everyone I met and had a packed day with orientation and such. They filled my head with revenue goals, growth trajectories and made my mind spin with the endless opportunities for an analyst like me. Our product lines are so exciting and I can't wait to get into the work! People are fast-paced, super smart, and whoa, so motivated and energetic! I love working with people who know what they are doing and love their job. These people look like they looked forward to being in their work stations even on a day such as this. I woke up this morning to horribly grey skies and drove for a hr to work. I live only 12 miles away and yet, it took me an hr to arrive. All i can say is... I hate city traffic. I'm going to take the shuttle from now on. Got my great benefits....my new laptop...and now, I just need that blackberry have to find out how I can get my hands on one. on the hand, if what the ppl with the blackberries say is true - i might not wanna become the workaholic who walks into walls and doors because I'm constantly checking it  At lunch, I was humorously reminded that work is not school. I returned a question about my summer and got a reply that reminded me that my life has been reduced to work, eat and sleep... and vacations will most likely be thanksgiving, christmas and new years day. Even with our great PTO package, it seems like most ppl still stick around for the holidays O_o. I guess I'll learn what that really means soon. Tomorrow will be another exciting day. Sg2 is putting on another conference - Annual Business and Technogy Forecast at the Westin near O'Hare. Waking up bright and earlier and meeting a co-worker at the station to drive over. The only downside is... I need to go to bed early today! (I went to bed at 9pm last night - geez... i'm getting old). Anyhow, for anyone bored enough to check on my life.. that's what I've done . I'm getting settled into my apt and things are falling into place, Praise the Lord. | | |
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